An Indomitable Spirit
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, THINK about such things.” (Philippians 4:8 NIV)
Nothing is more draining in a leader’s life than personal insecurity: falsely projecting feelings we think others have towards us. Leaders need to deal with this in order to be what people need from them. Those we lead are looking for stability in our emotional outlook. We have enough external negativity trying to drag us down. We don’t need our own internal forces working against us as well. That’s why the Bible tells us to intentionally redirect our thoughts towards those things that are true, good, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy. The benefits are exponential. Here are three keys to help you get ahold of emotional stability.
Stop internalizing everything you feel.
Insecure leaders are proficient at manufacturing crisis: mental battles over absolutely nothing. We have to stop the insanity. Cease manufacturing conflict. Not all your emotions are necessarily true of your situation. Leader: you must quit feeling like everyone is against you. Self-centeredness is the problem here. Not everything is about you. You are not the center of the universe. Stop wasting precious time and energy carrying negative emotional baggage (past or present). Once you start on the track to internalizing negative emotions, it can be a slippery spiral downward. Instead, have an indomitable spirit. Choose to rise above your emotions and elevate your own mood. You can quickly shake off the residue of misperception by telling yourself, “What I’m feeling right now is probably not true of my situation.”
Don’t believe everything you think.
Our thoughts are not always certainties. Running down this path leads to a self-defeating victim mentality. Stop overthinking everything: the act of creating scenarios that don’t exist. And by all means, stop overanalyzing your life and the people you lead. Overanalyzing causes us to misread people and circumstances. Leaders are responsible to create clarity for themselves and others. Overanalyzing breeds suspicion. So, instead of imagining the worst-case scenario, why not start believing the best-case scenario. The way you think is the way you will live and lead (Proverbs 23:7). Believe and look for the good in every situation. The next time you walk into a meeting or pubic gathering, set your intention and say to yourself, “I will look for the good in every person around me and believe the best in them.”
Lead yourself into positive emotions.
An effective way to get ahold of your life and leadership is to anticipate your emotions. However, before you can lead yourself toward positive emotions you must first lead yourself away from the negative. This is to predetermine how you would normally feel in a given situation vs the emotions you desire. A good practice is to make a working list of all the negative emotions you tend to gravitate toward vs the opposite emotion you want to feel (i.e. pessimistic vs optimistic, glum vs. joyful, disconnected vs. connected, opinionated vs curious, nervous vs excited, etc.). Neuroscientists have suggested that positive emotions prompt new cell growth (plasticity) whereas negative emotions cause decay. Our brains literally become stronger through positive thinking. Positive thinking + positive emotions = a healthy mind!
