Measured Conversations

One of the biggest challenges I have had as a leader is talking less and listening more. I am constantly and intentionally working to turn this around. This applies especially for meetings. Often, meetings went way past their purpose, and sometimes things were said that should not have been said. There is a need in a leader’s life for measured conversations. Here are some principles I have learned over the years and continue to apply that have greatly helped me when scheduling meetings.

1. Set a Time.

Shorter meetings are best. Longer meetings allow for idle chatter and awkward moments. Sometimes looking at your watch periodically can help keep the conversation moving along.

2. Set a Goal.

Write out what you want to say and say it. A meeting agenda may be necessary. Having a guide for yourself and those you meet with helps you stay on track and provide solutions.

3. Set a Place.

Make the place appropriate to your meeting. If it’s official, keep it in an office setting. A place sends a message that it’s business or pleasure. Rule: Keep your office door open.

4. Set a Guard.

Watch your words. Withhold deep personal information. Keep the conversation on the other person. Let them do the talking. Restrain your emotions. This reflects stability. (Proverbs 10:19)

5. Set a Tone.

Tone is everything in a meeting. A relaxed demeanor in our approach sets the atmosphere and helps people focus on the matter at hand. Keep your cool no matter what (Proverbs 15:1,8).

6. Set a Foundation. 

Pray before meetings. Ask God for wisdom and discernment and to help you relax and be prepared for whatever is said. Allow people to share their concerns without defending yourself.

7. Set a Boundary. 

Some request a meeting to ambush you. Ask them why they want to meet ahead of time and give you only two items to discuss. This will better prepare and protect you from the unexpected.